{"id":17192,"date":"2019-11-11T13:14:07","date_gmt":"2019-11-11T19:14:07","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.thebozho.com\/?p=17192"},"modified":"2019-11-20T12:23:01","modified_gmt":"2019-11-20T18:23:01","slug":"madison-thrifting-books-bears-november-2019","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.thebozho.com\/madison-thrifting-books-bears-november-2019\/","title":{"rendered":"Let\u2019s go thrifting: Books, bears and basement art at Agrace Thrift Store"},"content":{"rendered":"

Thrift stores are a great representation of the human id. They\u2019re chaotic, kitschy and filled with things that straddle the line between \u201ctrash\u201d and \u201ctreasure.\u201d For this monthly feature, we will head out to Madison-area shops in search of both.<\/em><\/span>\n

Location: <\/strong>Agrace Thrift Store<\/a>, 2402 E. Springs Dr.
\nDate: <\/strong>Nov. 7, 2019<\/p>\n

\u201cSometimes you eat the b\u2019ar,\u201d says The Stranger in The Big Lebowski.<\/em> \u201cAnd sometimes the b\u2019ar, well, he eats you.\u201d<\/p>\n

It was only a matter of time before my luck ran out. That\u2019s no discredit to Agrace, though. In thrifting, as in life, there are ups and downs. The b\u2019ar will inevitably eat you, as Sam Elliott\u2019s Stranger so succinctly put it in that classic Coen Brothers film. That said, my findings were a little lighter than usual \u2014 but this is a case of quality over quantity. Yes, I may have found less stuff, but the stuff I did find was strange enough to merit writing about. (And stick around for a field trip across the street.)<\/span>\n

\"So<\/p>\n<\/span>\n

\u2018So You\u2019re Visiting New York City!\u2019<\/h2>\n

Ah yes, The Big Apple! The city that never sleeps! Presumably a lot has changed in New York since this book was published in 1939<\/a>. I mean, it predates disco by more than 30 years. But it\u2019s undoubtedly filled with useful advice about haberdasheries, shoe-shines and which jazz clubs have the best left-handed cigarettes. This could be a good anticipatory buy for whenever scientists figure out time travel; you can never be too prepared.<\/p>\n

Price: $2.99<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/span>\n

\"Blockfl\u00f6ten-ABC\"<\/p>\n<\/span>\n

\u2018Blockfl\u00f6ten-ABC\u2019<\/h2>\n

The first thing about this book, obviously, is that it\u2019s entirely in German. \u201cBlockfl\u00f6te\u201d is the German word for \u201crecorder,\u201d aka the instrument we all learned to play in elementary school before promptly forgetting. This book allows you to get your groove back and reteach yourself the smooth stylings of the blockfl\u00f6te. Even if you can\u2019t speak German, music is a universal language. A little bit of practice and you\u2019ll be wailing on that blockfl\u00f6te like Kenny G in no time. Viel Spa\u00df beim Spielen, Leser! (That\u2019s \u201cHappy playing, reader!\u201d in German according to Google Translate.)<\/p>\n

Price: 99\u00a2<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/span>\n

\"How<\/p>\n<\/span>\n

\u2018How to Get Started in Christian Music\u2019<\/h2>\n

Agrace has a hefty selection of books, which is why my finds were literary-heavy. None spurred as many questions as How to Get Started in Christian Music<\/em>. For one thing, it\u2019s written by a guy named \u201cChris Christian,\u201d which sounds like a name he made up on the spot. I imagined the publisher asking, \u201cWhy should I publish your Christian music book?\u201d Replied Chris Christian: \u201cWell, my name is Chris Christian.\u201d But it has a foreword written by Amy Grant, one of the most successful Christian artists ever. If she was willing to coign this project, there must be some truth to what Chris Christian says. And surprisingly, there is: Chris Christian is a prolific songwriter in the secular music world. His songs have been recorded by everyone from Elvis Presley to Hall & Oates<\/a>. The world is a magical place, full of wonder.<\/p>\n

Price: I forgot to write it down, but any advice from Chris Christian is priceless.<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/span>\n

\"Humphrey,<\/p>\n<\/span>\n

Humphrey, the Bear Who Fucks<\/h2>\n

One look at this old teddy bear and you know he fucks<\/em><\/a>. For starters, wearing a smoking jacket is like carrying a big neon sign that says, \u201cI\u2019m the one doing all the fucking around here.\u201d In internet parlance, this bear exudes big dick energy. I half-expected him to have a little tumbler of cognac and a Cuban cigar sitting alongside him. And his name is \u201cHumphrey,\u201d according to the tag. There you have it: Humphrey, the Bear Who Fucks.<\/p>\n

Price: $9.99<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/span>\n

\"Mirrored<\/p>\n<\/span>\n

Mirrored Corvette art<\/h2>\n

There\u2019s a subsection of art that I like to call \u201cfinished basement art.\u201d It\u2019s all the great Midwestern kitsch you grew up looking at while playing Mario Kart 64 in your friend\u2019s rec room. Paintings of fish, wooden clocks… it could all fall under the umbrella of finished basement art (henceforth \u201cFBA\u201d). For example, take this Corvette \u2014 it\u2019s mirrored, which is a great start as unnecessarily mirrored things are peak FBA. It\u2019s also a picture of an American muscle car, which checks another FBA box. Add in a playfully crude slogan and you\u2019re got a premier example of FBA. I can practically smell the hockey pads from the other room.<\/p>\n

Price: $14.99<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/span>\n

\"Holland<\/p>\n<\/span>\n

Holland slippers<\/h2>\n

Holland calls to mind images of wooden clogs and windmills, so it makes sense that these souvenir slippers would be a combination of each. Sure, the pointy toes may seem inconvenient for cozy clothes, but to balance it out it looks like they\u2019ve never been worn. This means one of two things. It could be that someone went to the Netherlands and bought these slippers, only to change their mind upon returning home. Or the person got them as a gift from someone and never wore them, probably because they don\u2019t look all that comfortable. The soles are arched, which doesn\u2019t seem conducive to comfy slippers. That said, I could totally see someone like Kerwin Frost<\/a> rocking these bad boys, and he\u2019s a pretty stylish dude.<\/p>\n

Price: $6.99<\/strong><\/span>\n

Unfortunately, I didn\u2019t find as much as I hoped to at Agrace. Some of their stuff was a bit pricey, and even more of it was \u2014 for lack of a better term \u2014 old people stuff. That doesn\u2019t mean it\u2019s bad stuff; it just wasn\u2019t for me. But I still needed to get my full thrift fix, so I popped across the street to Goodwill East Towne. And this find was too good not to share, so I\u2019m tacking it on the end here:<\/span>\n

\"Race<\/p>\n<\/span>\n

\u201cI sleep in a racing car, do you?\u201d<\/h2>\n

Incredible.<\/p>\n

Price: $14.99<\/strong><\/span>\n